Long Texting in SMS 📜 Is It OK to Send Long Text Messages?

How long can a text message be? Get tips for crafting the ideal 💬 text, from short to long 📃 messages. Learn when to send a standard SMS vs. long text message

To Send or Not to Send: The Etiquette of Texting

Text messaging has become one of the most common ways we communicate in the digital age. With the ability to send messages instantly from anywhere, it's no wonder that texting has exploded in popularity. However, when it comes to the length of our texts, not all messages are created equal. While a quick "hello" or confirmation text might only require a sentence or two, sharing more complex thoughts can result in lengthier messages. So how long is too long when it comes to texting? Let's explore the do's and don'ts around composing and sending extended texts.

What's Considered a Long Text Message?

There's no definitive rule for what constitutes a "long" text, but generally anything over 2-3 sentences could be pushing it. With most phones limiting standard SMS messages to 160 characters, it doesn't take much to hit that threshold. Even a moderately detailed paragraph can spill over into multiple messages. Some key factors to consider are:

  • Number of sentences - More than 3-4 sentences likely qualifies as a lengthy message.
  • Word count - Anything over 50-60 words will appear dense and heavy on the recipient's screen.
  • Number of separate texts - Once your message spans multiple individual text notifications, it's entering long territory.
  • Reading time - If your text takes more than 10 seconds for the average person to read and digest, it could be considered long-winded.

So in summary, if your message contains multiple paragraphs, requires excessive scrolling to read in full, or breaches the standard 160 character SMS limit, you're probably sending a "novel" by texting standards.

More than 3-4 sentences likely qualifies as a lengthy messageMore than 3-4 sentences likely qualifies as a lengthy message

Is It Okay to Send Long Text Messages?

Whether it's acceptable to send an extended text depends greatly on the situation and relationship you have with the recipient. Here are some factors to consider:

  • Closeness of your relationship - Long texts may be more expected and welcomed from close friends and family. But take care when messaging new connections.
  • Nature of the topic - Weighty, emotional issues warrant more detail. But save the essays for less mundane matters.
  • Established norms - If lengthy messaging is common between you and the recipient, longer texts are likely fine.
  • Their typical response style - Match the length of their usual messages to get a sense of their comfort zone.
  • Their current availability - Be mindful of sending long texts when you know they're busy or unable to respond in depth.

The overarching rule of thumb is to consider the recipient's needs and preferences, not just your desire to express yourself. If in doubt, shorter is safer when dealing with new contacts or sensitive subjects. Gauge their willingness to engage in a drawn out, complex dialogue before bombarding them with a novel.

Why Do People Send Long Texts?

For the texter, extended messages can seem necessary to convey complex emotions or fully capture an experience. But the motivation behind verbose texts boils down to a few root causes:

  • Overthinking - The urge to overexplain or ensure perfect clarity.
  • Excitement - When enthusiasm leads to excessive detail or tangents.
  • Anxiety - Worrying the message won't be understood or received well.
  • Desperation - Trying too hard to hold the recipient's attention and interest.
  • Limited self-awareness - Not realizing how long-windedness can impact the recipient.
  • Bad habits - Relying too heavily on texts for meaningful communication.
  • Disinhibition - Feeling emboldened about length due to the distance/asynchronicity of texting.

While the texter's intent may be harmless, even well-meaning overflowing messages can irritate. So be conscious of not just your messaging motivation, but also its impact.

How to Text Long Messages the Right Way

When you do need to send a more extended text, keep these tips in mind to craft it considerately:

  • Split it up - Break long messages into coherent bite-sized texts. Don't barrage them all at once.
  • Ask permission - Request their availability and interest before diving into a lengthy topic.
  • Summarize first - Give a brief overview of your key points upfront.
  • Organize sections - Use line breaks and bullet points to segment blocks of text.
  • Avoid walls of text - Double space between paragraphs for better readability.
  • Proofread tightly - Edit down and remove unnecessary words or repetition.
  • Mind your tone - Be extra warm and conversational to offset the impersonal distance.
  • Highlight questions - Use question marks wisely to indicate points for response.
  • Double check delivery - Confirm they received all parts of a multipart message.
  • Circle back later - Follow up in person or by call to fill in any gaps.

With care, forethought and empathy, it is possible to text extensively in a way that feelsconsiderate rather than disruptive. The key is striking the right balance for the situation.

What It Means If Someone Sends a Long Text

When you're on the receiving end of a voluminous text, don't jump to conclusions. Consider the context and relationship you have with the sender. A long-winded message could signify:

  • Comfort level - They feel able to open up and be themselves with you.
  • Interest - They're invested in keeping the conversation flowing with you.
  • Connection - The topic resonates deeply so they have a lot to say about it.
  • Processing thoughts - They're working through something complex and need to get it out.
  • Social struggles - They may have difficulty being concise or sensing when to stop.
  • Technical barriers - Some older phones split texts oddly or have keyboard issues.
  • Context collapse - They misjudge the appropriate depth for the medium.

Before reacting, discern their motivation and the role you play in their lives. With open communication, you can gently set boundaries around texting style if needed. But avoid assumptions. Let the context guide your interpretation of long messages.

Before reacting, discern their motivation and the role you play in their livesBefore reacting, discern their motivation and the role you play in their lives

The Bottom Line - Let SMS stay Short Messages Service

At the end of the day, good texting requires mutual consideration - thinking of what's best for the other person, not just yourself. Before firing off a lengthy digital discourse, ask if it's truly necessary or might better be shared live. On the flip side, accept that verbose messages don't always denote ill intent. With care for the recipient in mind, we can avoid letting text length become a thorn in our digital communication.

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Think Before You Send a Long Text Message

Text messaging services have expanded the ways we can communicate via phone. With SMS and MMS capabilities, our options for sending texts are no longer limited to brief 160 character snippets. We can now compose lengthier messages, adding nuance and depth even sans face-to-face conversation. However, just because we can send elongated texts doesn't mean we always should. So how can we determine when it's appropriate to text at length? Let's explore some key considerations.

There are two main types of texters - the terse and the verbose. Neither style is inherently right or wrong, but understanding where you and your recipient fall on that spectrum can help guide expectations. If you tend to craft complex textual tomes while they prefer surgical brevity, friction can arise.

Before launching into a lengthy SMS diatribe, consider the objective. Are you composing a novel out of anxiety, self-absorption, or habits left over from the days of letter writing? Or is the extended message truly necessary given the topicand relationship dynamics? Err on the side of concision whenever feasible.

There are two main types of texters - the terse and the verboseThere are two main types of texters - the terse and the verbose

If you haven't gotten a reply, pause before redoubling your word count. At a certain point, you're just talking to yourself. And even if they have read your missives, take non-replies as data too. Adapt your communication mode to align with their preferences where possible.

Unicode extensions can increase your character allowances, but be wise in using this power. Just because an SMS technically can contain a dissertation doesn't mean it should. Save the long-form prose for medium better suited for back-and-forth exchange.

Ultimately, the best SMS style is controlled and considerate - short or long form. Neither brevity nor verbosity definitively dictates thoughtfulness. Either extreme done artlessly can frustrate the recipient. Master the balancing act by examining motivation and impact, not just mechanics and capabilities. That's how texting builds rapport rather than ruining it, regardless of length limits.


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